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Being Lovingly Present

I had the privilege of being with my mother when she transitioned out of her body. It was the most magical, mystical, and amazing process. She and I had worked on spiritual principles for many years - mostly inspired by my father's death 12 years earlier. She was ready to release her body, with all of its pain and cancerous decay. She saw her body as a limitation, no longer serving her after 62 years of working hard. We agreed that her little body had been holding onto rage. Her fear made manifested as cancer. Now she was exhausted physically, mentally, and emotionally. We trusted that her Totality was unlimited and eternal. She was most anxious to return to this.

We spoke at great lengths over the last days of her life. She asked many questions. I shared my feelings, thoughts, and beliefs with her. She took comfort in them.

"When can I go. Why do I have to wait?"

These innocent questions touched my heart. "I don't know, Mama. You seem ready. You can surrender and release any time now."

"All who have loved you will be there waiting with open arms for you, Mama. Excited to see you, they'll help you to remember how it works on the other side."

"No more pain, huh?"

"No more pain, Mama."

"This body is so heavy, it drags me down, holds me back," she'd murmur.

I'd look at the tiny, frail 87 pound body before me. I recall her weightlessness as I carried her in my arms to the bath. How delicate she seemed, how fragile.

"You don't need it any more. Let it go, Mama. Once you leave your body behind, you'll know the truth about all the experiences you created for yourself here on Earth. What was REALLY going on will be revealed. Then you can choose what you want to do next. Where, when, and how you can have the best experiences to grow and awaken. You'll script a whole new lifetime for yourself once you've reviewed and learned all that you can from this one."

"I feel like I've failed so badly. I've done so little here. I've contributed nothing. All I'm truly proud of is bringing up you. I've wasted my life with so much unhappiness."

Sometimes, as I observed my mother, I'd notice her focus would go in and out. I would watch her eyes, so blue and clear. She would look right at me as though seeing deeply into me. Then her gaze would wander to a point beside me or behind me. She would watch something or someone not visible to me at all. I believe spirit beings were there.

I especially loved holding my mother in my arms, stroking her face and hair, singing softly to her, or reading to her from the various books we'd collected on death and dying. As my Mama would lay her face on my chest, she seemed so child-like. I would feel surges of compassion for her well up inside me. Now she seemed more peaceful and content. I couldn't help but feel amazed at the reversal of roles. Me holding her, feeding, bathing, and diapering her - just as she had done for me as an infant. How I felt her admiration, trust, and belief in me. How good she could make me feel about myself.

Once more speaking softly, I encouraged her to release. "You've been a wonderful mother. I love you so. I'm so grateful we had Soul Agreements to come together again this lifetime. You've taught me so much. Now you can rest. You've completed what you came to do."

"See the Light. Allow it to absorb you. Move into the Light, Mama. Feel its' warmth, the Love it holds for you…"

I talked on and on until I heard her breath deepen and slow.

"Can we try again? I do want to go. Help me, please."

I sat behind her, straddling Mama's body with my legs, her head against my chest. I stroked her forehead.

I began talking her through the thin veils, which seem to hang between the form and the formless. I encouraged her with soothing words. I gave her my permission and my blessing to assist her in making passage.

"You can let go anytime. Please, Mama, go now."

At that moment, the tiny body in my arms quivered. She sighed. Her mouth was open as she exhaled one last time. I held my breath waiting for her next inhale. It never came. My hand on her heart could feel it continue to beat. But as I waited, the beating slowed down, and stopped. My mother was pure spirit now. The limp, lifeless body was no longer carrying her Soul. Beautifully, gently, she made the transition. What a blessing for me to have been there for the miracle.

 


 

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