Do you remember the beloved story of the footprints in the sand? It has always moved me tremendously. One night, a man had a dream that he was walking along the beach with the Lord and across the skies flashed scenes from his life. In each scene, there were two sets of footprints in the sand, one was his and one was the Lord's. The man noticed that at the lowest and saddest times in his life, there was only one set of footprints. He asked the Lord "I don't understand why you left my side when I needed you most". The Lord said, "My precious child, I never left you during your time of trial. Where you see only one set of footprints, I was carrying you."
One aspect of being Awake is living in Trust and Faith that we ARE carried. As individuated expressions of God, our connection to God is our Soul. It is written in the bible to listen to the "still small voice" within us. If we listen, our Soul will guide us. Our Soul creates experiences for us to Wake Up, to become Conscious, if we choose.
It is a tremendous shift from living at the level of ego, with its dramas and self-doubt, to living in Trust and Faith, to living at the level of Soul. Boring? No. Peaceful? Exhilarating? Yes. Surrendering the little personal will to Divine Will is one of the most difficult, scary, yet rewarding changes I have ever made in my life. If I live by my Soul's guidance, I surrender and trust all will be for the highest good. I am not attached to the outcome.
The results of this shift over a l2 year period have made me a believer in another way to live - a way which offers consistent joy, a release from suffering. It has made me a believer in God. It has made me a believer in myself as Creator of my own reality. It has made me a believer that I am God, I am Love. Everything is part of my own Consciousness.
My path to Awakening:
I grew up in an environment of fear and limitation. My confidence was very low. I was not supported for my "uniqueness". I grew up feeling different and inadequate. One boyfriend told me I was more than 2 standard deviations from the mean. I was taught always to look to the outside environment to know myself, rather than being encouraged to develop my inner landscape, my gifts. Once I began to feel the stirrings of Spirit inside me, I got in touch with my inner landscape. I knew there was another side of me that was beautiful, magical that I had not yet discovered. I got in touch with my deep mystical nature. I began my spiritual path alone. My initial years on the pathless path were about having a guru and continuing to look outside myself.
One day, an event occurred which changed my life forever. I was diagnosed with a frightening illness. This turned out to be a great blessing as it brought me to a teacher who helped me learn to Love myself. She taught me how to look inside rather than outside myself for Love. This began the most amazing journey of my life: the journey of Self-Love. The key: Self-Love. Until one develops a level of Love and intimacy with oneself, one cannot truly develop it with another.
This teacher taught me about choice and taking responsibility for my life by doing "The Work". She taught me how to listen to my Soul, so I no longer needed to look outside of myself for answers. Doing "The Work", I learned a whole new thought system - God Thoughts. These are Esoteric Teachings which have helped me come to a place of Trust and Faith. I am here for one thing, LOVE. Now, my entire day is about remembering in each thing I do that I am only here to Love. Nothing more. All decisions, all actions, all words, all feelings, all thoughts stem from the endless wellspring of Love from God, from Source, from Soul within me.
As I surrender my little will to Divine Will, I see the footprints. I feel carried. God is always by my side. God, which I am, is always supporting me. My Soul is always guiding me if I will but listen. I'm a believer. A believer in God. A believer in myself. I'm a believer because in doing "The Work", I have seen my life transform miraculously. Some days I count the miracles which occur. I bless everything and live my life as a prayer. I'm a believer. A believer in the Power of Love. A believer in the Power to Choose how I want to be in every moment. A believer in the Power of Myself to create my own Heaven, or my own Hell, right here on Earth.
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